Ethel's Writing's

Jill (c) ethel Hiday Wicksey

ethel_wicksey@live.ca

 http://ethelswritings.yolasite.com/ 

 

Jill

Foreword

I want to tell you a story. It could be true, or it could be just a story. Only God and I will ever know. If you recognize yourself, that is OK, because it is about different people that have been hurt, or have hurt. Yes you, I, and every other person, out there who have ever been hurt by some one else. It is about the little girl, or boy, inside us who was broken by an adult at some time in our life. About the times, we felt all alone, with nowhere to turn. The time when we did something wrong and were never caught. When we, as a teenager, made a wrong choice, and had to live with the consequence. About young adults who having no confidence in themselves, turned to other sources to bring comfort. This story is about a lifetime of memories, some good, some not so good.

You will learn how two families dealt with a tragedy. I hope you will catch the vision of how God used people, one at a time to bring healing. Please listen to the essence of the story. Take time to feel the pain, but grow with the people. Feel God’s love. See the love of Jesus God’s Son. Hear the intercessory prayers of friend’s and family.

Jill is Roy’s younger sister. They had a hard life as children and teenagers. Their father would come home drunk every Friday, after a night out with his friends. Jill had learned to hide and sleep in the crawl space behind her closet, so that her Father would not hurt her. He was not small enough to come in after her. She would hear her mother scream, as her father pushed her around. Roy, when he was big enough, tried to stand up to his father. He took many a beating, protecting his sister and mother.

Their dad was like, Jekyll and Hyde. He would wake up the next morning, with a headache, and no memory of what had happened the night before.

The rest of the week, he was a kind loving gentle man. He would take Jill and Roy fishing. He helped Roy fix up an old convertible that had been his first car. On Sundays, he would drive the family to church. He sang all the songs and bowed his head in all the right places. Every-one loved him. He always had a smile on his face. On Monday morning, he would go to work at his barbershop. No one knew the family secret. Drinking caused him to become mean and violent. Roy and Jill vowed that they would never take a drink when they grew up. They had first hand knowledge of how alcohol had hurt their family.

~~~~~~

Jill's Story

 “Mom, Mom! Can you brush my hair? I am going to be late. Tom and Sue will be here in an hour.” 

“Coming Jill,” her Mother picks up the hairbrush. "I love to brush your hair Jill. It seems like yesterday that you used my nail clippers to cut off big chunks of it. The shock I had when I saw you. Yellow golden curls, all over the bathroom floor.”

“It was all Roy’s fault mom. He would not stop teasing me. He would chase me around the house saying, Goldie Locks! Goldie Locks! The big bad bears are coming to eat you. Goldie Locks. He kept pretending he was one of the bears.”

“I know Jill, Roy has always been a big tease.”

“Remember when dad bought Roy that old second hand bike?"

“How could I ever forget that old bike Jill? There was red paint everywhere! What a mess! You were always out in the garage getting dirty.” 

“It was fun, Mom”

“You got more red paint on your brand new dress, than on Roy’s bike. You could not wait for your father to get home from work to help you. The red paint never did come off the floor. You must have been about seven years old.” 

“You don’t have to remind me, Mom. I think I had red paint on my legs and arms for weeks. Tom and Sue came to Roy’s ninth birthday party. Tom had his brand new blue bike. He wanted to exchange his bike for Roy’s used one.”

“I think he wanted the red one because you painted it. You still had red paint under your fingernails if I remember correctly. It took a lot of convincing on my part to make Tom take his brand new bike home.”

“Was that the year Tom’s father drove us all to Toronto to see the Santa Claus parade Mom?”

“No Jill. You were only four when we went to Toronto. What a time we had. The boys spent hours watching the toy trains on display in Toyland. I remember the temper tantrum you had because I wouldn’t buy a certain doll for you.”

“Oh! Mother, I didn’t.”

“Yes you cried like a spoiled brat.”

“How embarrassing!”

“I wish I had a camera to catch the excitement on Roy’s face the day he came in from the wood shed jumping up and down and shouting, “Santa had come! Santa had come!” We thought he was joking. He kept jumping up and down! We all ran out to see why he was yelling. The old workbench was covered with Christmas gifts wrapped in big red ribbons. Several boxes were full of food. We had no money for Christmas presents that year. We had talked about buying a train for Roy and a doll for you, but we just did not have the money. You can’t eat toys.”

“Do you think Tom and his mother brought the gifts, Mom?”

“We will never know Jill. Some one was kind to our family that year.”

“I still have the doll. Was it the same doll I wanted you to buy me at Eaton’s Mom?”

“I think it was. The food sure helped to stretch our budget that winter. Once a week without fail, there was a box of food in the shed.”

“Tom and his family have always been so special. Remember when they took Roy and me with them to Disneyland.”

“How can I forget Jill? The house was quiet for one whole month.”

“We were not that noisy, Mom. We need to spend an evening and look at the movies from that trip. Wow! What fun we had.”

“Tom and his parents have so much, yet they are always willing to share what they have with others. Just last Christmas we loaded up Tom’s brand new car with gifts. There was hardly room for us. We had to hold boxes of toys and food on our laps. We must have looked silly driving down the road that day. The trunk was full also. We took it over to the Smith family. You remember Ben Smith, my grade ten-teacher mom. He died three weeks before Christmas last year.”

“Yes, Jill I know his wife Ann. She has three small children.”

“That is the family. We put the boxes in the back of their old truck. When we got home, Roy phoned Ann. He used a deep voice and said “Santa had been there. Go look in back of your truck.”

“What good memories you and Roy have. Tom and Sue have been your best friends.”

Jill sat at the vanity, looking at her reflection as her mother brushed her golden curls.

“Your hair is so shiny; I swear I can almost see my reflection in it. You are beautiful Jill. I have a special gift for you.” Her mother reaches into her pocket and pulls out a black velvet case. She removes a perfect white pearl on a gold chain.

“Oh mother! Not your Grandmother’s pearl?”

“Yes Jill! My mother gave this pearl to me the day I wed your father. Her mother gave it to her when she married your grandfather. I saved it to give to you. Take good care of it. It brings back a lot of special memories.”

Jill leans forward as her mother encircled her neck with the fine gold chain and closed up the delicate clasp. Jill stands up and hugs her mother. “I love you mother. Thank you! Thank you!”

“I know this will be a special night for you Jill. After all these years, Tom has asked you to marry him. Have fun at the homecoming dance tonight.”

“Thank you, Mother. Tom is so kind. His sister Sue has been my best friend all my life. In two years Sue will be my sister in law.”

“That is enough reminiscing. It is almost six. We have to hurry.”

“How do I look?”

Roy enters the room and gives a wolf whistle. “You look like you need a chaperone tonight Jill. Will I do?” He walks over and gives Jill a bear hug flipping up her golden hair. “Hi! Goldie Locks!”

“Oh Roy, stop it. You will mess up my hair.”

“Tom and Sue are waiting in the living room. Race you to the door.”

“Not fair! You know I can’t run in heals.”

“Take my arm then, so you won’t trip over those daggers on your feet.”

“Stop teasing. Give me your arm Roy.”

Roy proudly holds out his arm and escorts his sister Jill down the stairs.

Their mother camera in hand blocks the door, “Wait. I want to get some pictures, smile.” 

Tom whistles, “Wow! You are beautiful Jill.” He walks over and pins a burgundy and white orchard on Jill’s pink silk dress. “Hello Mrs. Hill Your daughter is as beautiful as you."

“Flattery will get you nowhere Tom.”

“I love you,” he whispers in Jill’s ear, as he escorts her to the front door.

“Promise you will drive safe Roy. Good night, have a good time,” their mother, says as she stands waving in the doorway.

Jill runs back and gives her mother a hug. “I love you mom. Don’t wait up.”

Jill ties a scarf around her head. She loves the feel of the wind, blowing through her hair as they speed along the road. Not tonight. Her mother had spent hours fixing it in such a special way. She felt so blessed. What a feeling, to be sitting beside her fiancé Tom, with her best friend Sue up front beside her dear brother Roy. Oh, the excitement! ‘Thank you God for being with me.’

It was a breathtaking evening. Jill told Tom after a few hours, “If I have to pose in front of another camera, or say cheese for one more picture I will fall over.”

Tom just laughed. “May I have this dance,” he asked. He takes Jill by the arm, moving her gently out on to the dance floor.

The night went on and on, like a dream. Jill thought it would never end. The last dance was over and it was time to go. They had been invited to stop at Rodgers house, on the way home for a party. His parent’s were away, and he had the house to himself.

Jill felt so good to sit beside Tom and have her hair blown by the wind at last while they drove up the highway. Jill felt so free. Roy and Sue were laughing. Oh! If the night would never end, Jill would be happy.

All too soon, they pulled into Rodger’s driveway. Rodger asked them to come in. Help your self to the punch. Snacks are in the Kitchen. Tom handed Jill a glass.

What a strange tasting punch, Jill thought. “What did you put in the punch Rodger?”

“Oh, just something to give it a bit of Kick, if you know what I mean? Ha! Ha!”  

“Tom, I think I will dump mine. Please, do not drink yours. I think it is spiked,” Jill told him as she walked over to the sink.

Tom dumps his also and says, “I will get us a can of pop Jill.”

The party lasted a long time. Soon, Roy started to act just like her father. Jill tried to get him to stop drinking the punch. Roy seemed to get aggravated, so Jill just walked away from him.

Roy staggered over to Jill and told her, “It is time to go home.”

Jill begged Roy, “Please let Tom Drive. I think you have had too much to drink.”

“No way sissy,” Roy told her. “I worked five years fixing up my car. No one but me gets behind the wheel.”

Jill had never seen this side of her brother before. Roy kept getting angrier and angrier so she just shut up and got into the car.

~~~~~~

Jill never remembered what happened on the way home. She woke up in pain. Her head felt as if it was going to fall off. Her mother was holding her hand. Her arm and leg were in a cast and she had bandages on her face. Roy was standing at her bedside. His head was hung. It looked like he had been crying.

“What Happened? Where am I? Mother! Roy! Why have you been crying?”

“Jill Honey! I love you. You finally woke up! You have been in a coma for three days. Thank God you are alive.”

“What happened I can’t remember? What Happened? Where are Tom and Sue?” 

“Just rest Jill! I love you.”

The nurse came in to give Jill a sedative. She fell into a deep sleep.

~~~~~~

Later at home, Roy sits talking with his mother.

“How are we going to tell Jill about Sue?”

“The doctor suggested we wait a few more days, until she is stronger. It is still touch and go, with her head trauma. She will need a lot of plastic surgery on her face. We are lucky she is still alive.”

“I am so sorry Mother. Why was I so stupid? Jill wanted me to let Tom drive. They tried to tell me the punch was spiked. I just would not listen to them. Mother how can I face Jill and tell her the truth?”

“It will not be easy. You have to face the truth. The truth some times hurts. You did make a wrong choice. You will have to live with that choice the rest of your life.”

“Mother, it was horrible. I was holding Sue in my arms, when she looked up into my eyes and said I love you Roy. Then she squeezed my hand for the last time and died.”

“Do you want to talk about it, Roy? I love you.”

Roy’s mother holds him as he weeps. She stokes his head and says another prayer. “God bless our family and help Jill and Tom to get better. Be with Tom’s family in their time of need. Help Roy to heal also. God help us and forgive Roy, for his mistake.”

“Thank you Mother. I do not know what I would have done without God’s and your love.

“Do you want to talk about the accident Roy?”

“Not now. I am not ready yet. It will be hard to face Tom tomorrow at the funeral. He will not be able to play football again. He will lose his football scholarship.” 

~~~~~~

The funeral was at the high school. The gym had been transformed with flowers and chairs. It was hard for Roy to walk up to the front of the Gym and look his best friend Tom in the eye. The girl he had planned to spend the rest life with was cold and dead, with her eyes shut never to open again. All their dreams and hopes dashed apart by a tree and a sharp curve in a road.

There was no way to turn the clock back to last Friday night. The, “if only’s,” would never give Sue back her life. He must live with the truth. His sweetheart Sue was dead and he might go to jail for the unnecessary death of his best friend’s twin sister. “Drunken driving Homicide,” the papers said. The punch had tasted horrible. He did not enjoy it. He just wanted to show Rodgers friends, that he was as cool as they were. He did not care if they put him in jail and threw away the key. He was guilty of being a fool. “What ifs,” served no good. “A what if” would not bring Sue back, or help fix the broken body of Jill or Tom.

How could he go home and eat another supper in the dining room? The atmosphere around his father was so thick the last few days that you could cut it with a knife. “Oh God, where were you when this happened?” shouted Roy as he slammed the front door and ran out of the house into the dark of night.

~~~~~~

Jill, who had just awakened from a coma, would need to undergo years of re-constructive surgery to repair the damage done to her face, when it came into contact with the pavement. She was lucky to be alive: or would she have been better off being killed, like Sue. If she were lucky, she would walk again, but always with a limp. The doctor had to remove part of her smashed leg to save it.

The funeral was over. Tom did not say much. He was sitting in his wheelchair in a daze. The doctor had given him some pills to help ease the pain. He had been a stupid idiot. He should have made Roy give him the car keys.

It was just as well that Jill could not remember what happened that night. She spent weeks in the Hospital with bandages on her head, face, and body. Her best friend, Sue, was dead and Roy, her brother, did not even have a scratch. All her friends came in to see her. After a while fewer, and fewer, friends stopped by.

Tom sat by her bedside every day, singing softly to her. This helped ease the pain.

Jill was not given a mirror for three weeks. Tom held her in his arms when she saw herself for the first time. She let out a scream. Cars did not have seat belts back then. She had been thrown from the convertible and landed on her face. Need I say anymore? She would need years of painful operations to remove the scars. Only time would heal the inner scars. Her heart ached because her friend Sue was dead.  

Tom continued to spend hours at Jill’s bedside supporting her. It was three months, before she was able to go home. It took a year, before she could walk again. She was in and out of the hospital for corrective surgery.

~~~~~~

Tom finished his schooling and became a Vet. He loved to see the sparkle back in Jill’s eyes, as she held the new baby kitten he brought her to feed. He had found it beside its dead mother at the side of the road on the way to work the week before.

Jill had hugged the little kitten to her with gentle hands had fed it from an eyedropper. It was because of her love, that the kitten had lived. Little Fuzz Ball helped Jill to heal. Tom could not wait to get off work to hear Jill tell about the funny things Fuzz Ball had done.

When Jill got better, she ended up working for Tom. Animals had a way of not noticing how a person walked or looked. The dogs loved the way Jill’s gentle hands rubbed their backs before Tom gave them a needle. Cats seemed to melt when she stroked under their chins. Their purr could be heard in the next room. People did not seem to see her scars when they brought in an animal that was hurting…They had confidence in Tom and Jill.

It took several years for Tom, to convince Jill to marry him. Jill and Tom were married in a quiet family wedding. Jill was uncomfortable being in crowds. People had a way of staring. She faced years of surgery to remove the scars. Tom was so kind and loving. He saw through the scars and loved the person who Jill was. Little Joy was born two year later. She looked just like her Aunt Sue who had died.

Both Tom and Jill’s families loved the Lord. It took time, prayer, and good counseling for the families to heal. It was because they were able to forgive and pray together, that the healing took place.

Roy spent one year in prison. It took years of talking and praying before the inner healing began in Roy’s life. He was blessed with a true friend in Tom. He came to the prison every month to pray with Roy. Tom and Jill would come over and pray with him every week after they were married. Their love of God helped them to forgive Roy for his mistake. He continued with his studies after his release and became a minister. His first Church was in the inner city over in the next town. Roy met Wilma a youth minister and they were married in his church, five years after the accident.

Jill’s father never took another drink after the night of the accident. He joined AA and helped his son Tom and Wilma, with the soup kitchen. He would sit with someone down on his or her luck, and talk about Jesus. Many a night he would be home late, because he took the time to care and pray. Sometimes, he would buy a change of clothes, or cut someone’s hair, so they could find a job. His life was never the same. He radiated the true love of God.

Life is hard sometimes. My friend Roy went through so much. Today, he can stand tall because he knows that God has forgiven him. God loves him. God was there the night Sue died in Roy’s arms. He will be there for you in your time of need also. Reach out your hand right now and ask God to take it. He is waiting for you. He loves you.

Ethel

© Ethel Hiday Wicksey

 ethel_wicksey@live.ca

http://ethelswritings.yolasite.com/ 

 

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